Co-sleeping yes or co-sleeping no?

And after 9 long months of waiting, spells and magical practices to discover the baby’s sex, sudden cravings of watermelon in the middle of the winter and endless laps to stores for the choice of the crib, the stroller, the changing table, the clothing, the covers and bed sheets ... you have become mom and dad: congratulations! Or should we better say "good luck"?

No need to lie: when you become a mom and a dad, your routine changes completely and, inevitably, the time devoted to the care of yourselves becomes less. Forget once and for all great sleeps! Going out on Saturday night, staying up late, going to bed at 5 in the morning and being able to wake up at 2 o'clock in the afternoon will become an utopia. Are you ready to sleepless nights and sudden sleep attacks during a conversation?
Well, especially in the first months of life the newborn struggle to distinguish between day and night and need several night feeds. But a good rest is essential and indispensable for all members of the family, so to make sure that the child has a peaceful relationship with the moment of sleep straight away, it is important to get him\her used to a proper sleep routine. And what is the most popular method but also the most discussed and controversial of the moment? The CO-sleeping.
The term, which translated in Italian means "act of sleeping together", is a practice that consists simply in letting your child, still infant, asleep in her\his mother and father’s bed.
This behavior is given by the natural parental instinct of cuddling and filling their children of attentions so to inculcate a sense of protection and safety in order to make the child stop crying, fussing and falling asleep immediately.
Let's see what are the pros and cons of this natural behavior that has been causing disagreements for years.

Yes to CO-sleeping

The main supporter of the CO-sleeping method is the Professor James McKenna, an anthropologist and director of the Research Laboratory on the maternal - infant sleep of the University of Notre Dame ( Paris ), as well as one of the world's leading experts on breastfeeding and co-sleeping

Scientific theory

McKenna argues that there is a scientific reason why the CO-sleeping is beneficial.
Human beings are born more premature from a neurological point of view, than other mammals: they have to be born with only 25% of the volume of their brain as an adult to be able to pass through the maternal pelvic opening. This means, supports McKenna, that their physiological system is not able to function optimally without a contact with the maternal body that continues to influence and adjust the baby more than during the entire gestation.
So for infants, claims McKenna, being with his mother during the night is essential to his growth: the breast contact is beneficial because it influences and regulates the physiological system of the child and, in fact, it is shown that the breath, temperature, blood pressure and stress levels affect each other. Conversely, McKenna says that the practice of letting newborn sleep alone, in addition to being wrong, is also devoid of empirical evidence. The CO-sleeping would not involve any psychological consequences for the children, indeed ,it would help them to become more calm and balanced people as adults.

Advantages

Besides these scientific facts are added advantages. In fact, co-sleeping facilitates breastfeeding. The moments of the night feeds are made easier, less tiring for the mother and child as they take place almost without having to wake up, going back to sleep quietly at the end of the meal. No doubt, if it is lived with serenity and awareness, sleeping next to your son deepens the relationship with him, helps to keep the nighttime awakenings under control and avoids the anxiety linked to unexpected fears.
And you, do you agree with McKenna?

No to CO-sleeping

What are the reasons that lead to evaluate negatively CO-sleeping?

1. 1.First of all the possible psychological effects on the child.
Very often sleeping with Mom and Dad is synonymous of being overprotective parents and an almost morbid behavior that might make the child more insecure and fearful as an adult. And then, getting used to his parents’ bed ,would he ever learn to sleep alone in his room? With CO-sleeping you would give him a "bad habit" that hardly will abandon.

2. In addition to the inconvenience or being left with a leg stuck between the third and fourth rib or having to stand poised on the edge of the bed, do we want to consider the intimacy with our partner reduced almost to an epistolary relationship?
The CO-sleeping affects negatively the intimacy of the couple and can also increase the fact of the father of feeling excluded and the misunderstanding of the mother, who very often finds herself alone to care for the baby. As we all know the birth of a child brings changes in the couple's relationship and plays a significant role as it creates a symbiotic relationship between the mother and the baby. Then the CO-sleeping does nothing but increase these hardships in the family thus contributing to the annulment of the couple's relationship.